Edition 5
February is the new January. Planning for your best year yet, an anti-overwhelm guide and sparking small moments of joy
Most of us have cottoned onto the overrated, forced fun/cheer that can be attached to the end-of-December festive season. The ultimate Instagram vs reality scenario, if 2020 taught us anything it’s that sometimes doing less can be much more rewarding. But what about January? New year, most likely same you.
It feels almost impossible not to get caught up in the reflective air that swoops in after Christmas, forcing you to face the past twelve months and put your performance up for review. And then there are the goals. How will you make next year different? Will this be your year?! (Personally, I quit claiming that after I felt that I jinxed 2020 by calling it the year of perfect vision - sorry all).
The pressure to hit the ground running on January 1st, while most of us are still wondering what day it is and feeling sluggish after having overindulged for the past week is, quite frankly, a recipe for disaster.
With stats showing that almost 80% of people admit to abandoning their New Year’s resolutions by February, I am clearly not the only one who finds this approach to January downright overwhelming. To make matters worse if, like me, you are in the Northern Hemisphere it’s also winter - featuring freezing temperatures, 16 hours of darkness a day, a distinct lack of vitamin D and the aptly named Blue Monday.
This is why I treat January as a month for surviving, not thriving. I am allowed to think about what I’d like to achieve this year, areas I’d like to see change and how I can improve, but there is no pressure to set goals and start attacking them in the dark at 6am on January 2nd.
So how do I approach planning my year? This month I’m sharing the one book I’ve used for the past 10 years, an anti-overwhelm guide and how to spark small moments of joy during the last month of winter.
Better days are coming, they’re called spring and summer!
READ: Your Best Year Yet!
I think this is the only book I have read more than The Daily Stoic. My Mum kindly lent me her copy when we were on a cruise from Hong Kong to Singapore in February 2014. Prefaced with the story that she had given another family member a copy and it had indeed, helped them achieve their best year yet, I figured it was worth a shot.
Just over one year later, me and my 90kgs of luggage (no book is a miracle worker) landed in London.
There is no guarantee this book will make 2023 your best year yet, but so far I haven’t found a better way to approach each year. This year I hesitated before picking it up again, undertaking some research into how a few of my favourite sources of inspiration approach their new year. While many of the strategies were interesting, none of them felt as well-rounded as Your Best Year Yet (YBBY).
What I love about the process is that you start with the positive - what you achieved - before reviewing disappointments and, most importantly, what you learnt from the previous year. This list is always so much longer than I expect it to be! From that frame of mind you look at how you are limiting yourself and where you need to shift your beliefs before reviewing your roles in life and goal setting.
The end result is a one-page plan with your guidelines (based on your top learnings), paradigm (mantra), the key role you want to focus on and top 10 goals for the year ahead.
There is no perfect way to plan your year. But, embarking on my 10th year of completing YBBY, the one book I never returned, forcing my Mum to go out and buy a new copy (sorry Mum), this is the one that I constantly recommend without hesitation.
As I approach my eight-year anniversary of arriving in London, I do not think it is a coincidence that the year I started using YBBY was the same year I finally bit the bullet and bought a one-way ticket to the UK. Maybe it’s worth a shot for you too?
IMPLEMENT: An anti-overwhelm guide for February
Having dwelled on the downside of January, it’s only fair I share some ideas to make the last month of winter as painless as possible.
One idea I love is looking at how much white space you have. White space is important for so many reasons - namely as a buffer between the busyness of life to rest, think, and listen to the thoughts swirling around your head - to check back in with yourself.
A refreshing way to do this is to wipe the slate clean. Literally - by deleting everything from your calendar and then adding only the essential back in. Voila! White space.
If that’s a bit dramatic for you, some smaller changes I’ve been testing to help avoid overwhelm and to disconnect from the constant notifications and noise are:
headphone-free walks to reap the full benefits of nature,
avoiding technology for an hour either side of bed,
reading instead of watching TV and
introducing time buffers into my days to avoid rushing from one activity to the next and allow me some downtime.
That said, don’t confuse the essential with all work and no play. Having things to look forward to is not only essential, but a key part of living a balanced life and allowing you to keep work or other challenges in perspective.
Leaving the house can be hard when it’s cold and dark but catching up with friends, attending a class you enjoy, or visiting a new restaurant or cultural space can really help to lift spirits and make the effort worthwhile. Last week I went to a networking event, two dinners with friends and The StartUp Show - the improvement from my week before was significant.
And if all else fails, many people, myself included, like to have their next trip planned/booked as a light at the end of the tunnel. If you can't beat the winter blues, escape them!
DO TRY THIS AT HOME: Small moments of joy
The term ‘spark joy’ conjures up images of Marie Kondo and her neat rows of orderly clothes soldiers. But the concept of sparking joy is about so much more.
While happiness can be hard to maintain on an ongoing basis (especially during winter), what feels much more attainable is looking for the small moments of joy in each day.
There is much evidence of the power of positive thinking and gratitude and its ability to improve your life. The good news is there is always something to be grateful for. Likewise, you can create more of these moments by peppering your environment and days with things that spark joy for you.
For me, fresh flowers always do the trick. Last week was freezing cold and often bleak, but every time I looked at my orange-red yellow tulips, I felt a spark of joy and remembered that this too shall pass - spring will come.
As a born and bred Aussie, I really struggle with SAD during London winters (in case it wasn’t already apparent). One thing I found to be really helpful during the Winter of 2020/21, when escape wasn’t an option, was to create a ‘building blocks of joy’ list. I won’t bore you with all 20 entries, but listing these out and sprinkling them throughout my days allowed me to trigger small moments of joy and gratitude. After all…
Tulips: £7
New book: £9.25
Smiling in winter: Priceless
PONDER:
“Rather than focusing on what you want to do this year. Perhaps consider who you’d like to be.” - Tamara Levitt
I leave you with this quote from Calm’s New Years Reflection Daily Calm. Tamara Levitt is an inspiring author and narrator, and her grounding meditations are a key part of getting my day off to the best start possible. This one in particular from the 31st December 2021 was a great way to frame the new year - I highly recommend listening to it in full.
At this time of year it's easy to focus on all that you want to achieve, but when it comes down to it, at the end of each day what matters most is who you are as a person and the qualities you are demonstrating.
I hope this instalment of Future You has sparked some inspiration. If so, please do share it with a friend or colleague who could also find it useful.
And if you read, implement or try this at home, I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments below. However, you are approaching 2023...
...here’s to your best year yet,
SJ